Falling Once Again into Angels' Arms
by sweetsteph
Summary: Will Leah survive without Ethan, and how will she follow the path her heart has carved for her.


Disclaimer: I do not own The Angels Trilogy or related characters, all that I own is what you don't recognize.

Falling Once again into Angels' Arms

Loving and Letting Go

Leah Lewis-Hall sat on the floor of her mother's living room, still crying. She couldn't take the world, she didn't want to accept what had just happened, and right now all she wanted was to be with Ethan. She loved him, but she knew she had to get over him. Could she do it? Could she become her own person once again?

Living without Ethan was becoming increasingly difficult for Leah. Not only had she lost Neil, she lost Ethan too, he wasn't dead, but he might as well be. She made up her mind that she had to get over Ethan as soon as possible, so the next days at school she'd find someone to go out with. She wanted to forget him, she wanted not to hurt every time she saw his face in her mind.

The next morning, she got up, got dressed, and went downstairs. The only problem was the first thing she heard was her mother's muffled sobs coming from within the bedroom. Neil had been half of her, and now it was only her, and the half that was left, hurt in extreme levels. A person has to become vulnerable, and learn to live with only half of themselves. Leah's mother was having an especially hard time with that.

Leah chose to leave her mother alone, to not interrupt her, and leave for school in the car Neil had so generously bought for her after the final round of chemo she had to endure. She drove down each street, holding back her tears…and finally realizing she couldn't hold them back anymore. She took the next exit. 65 miles to: Nappanee.

"Stop the car Leah!"

Leah drove quickly, without thinking, for 20 minutes until she realized she needed to stop to get gas. She pulled up to the gas station, filled up her car, and headed in to pay. She saw an amish buggy pull up, and it brought a tear to her eye, how would she ever handle life without Ethan?

She began to drive once again, and turned up the radio, in a feeble attempt to drown out the noisy thoughts in her head. When she saw the town limit sign for Nappanee, she pulled over her car and simply cried, for about half an hour, before she got up her nerve to confront Ethan. She drove the few miles out to the farm, without even thinking about how to get there. She'd played this very conversation out in her head many times, but now she couldn't even think of what she had meant to say to this boy who had brought a joy to her life she could never once again have.

She quietly walked up the walkway and to the door, to be greeted by Charity's delightful squeals.

"Leah, It's so amazing to see you, but I suspect you're not here to see me, Ethan's in the barn. I'll take you there." Said Charity.

"That'd be great Charity, but I'm a bit nervous." Replied Leah.

"Leah, he loves you, Father hasn't gotten him to do anything in the same way he used to since he returned home. His eyes are missing something that was there when you were around. We can barely take his mood swings any more." Said Charity, in an attempt to make this easier on Leah.

"Well, I feel the same for him, I love him, and I'm here to tell him that, if you could please take me to him." Said Leah, in a more polite tone than usual.

Greetings and Confrontations

"Ethan, there's someone here to see you," Said Charity.

Ethan stepped out of the barn, and suddenly a million memories were filling Leah's brain. She began to lose her train of thought and just couldn't think straight, but she was interrupted by Ethan's deep voice.

"Leah! Leah, what are you doing here?" he said, in a loving, but still accusatory tone.

"Ethan, take me to your woods again, I need to talk to you, and I need to do it before I lose my courage." Said Leah.

They walked the path to the woods in silence, but Leah couldn't help noticing the way he glanced at her every few minutes, as if to try and tell her something he couldn't say with words. She wanted every so badly for him to say those three words to her.

"Ethan, I love you, it's all I can say, I can't stand another day without you. I know how different we are, but" Leah was interrupted by Ethan.

"Leah, I love you too, this being away from you just isn't going to work." Said Ethan in that tone of voice she missed so very much.

Their words were interrupted by the long, passionate kiss that Ethan soon planted on Leah's lips. Her tears began to fall easily now, she let them hit her face and the ground and watched them dance their way into her heart. She knew now that living without Ethan was not an option, they had to make their differences work, but would Ethan leave his church, would he become something not accepted by his father, all for the love of Leah. She couldn't bear to think he wouldn't, but she knew in her heart of hearts that it would be tough.

Love

Ethan looked so lovingly into Leah's eyes, she could almost feel her heart melting inside of her. She looked back, barely able to hold the stare. They were in love, this is what it felt like, when you could see somebody's love through their eyes.

Ethan finally broke the silence, "Leah Lewis-Hall, I love you, will you marry me?"

"Can we get married? I'm not Amish, I don't fit in here," Said a worried Leah.

"Leah, I love you, and if they can't handle that, we can start our own lives our own way, but telling father will be hard…so will you marry me, or do I have to let my heart continue on, without what's necessary to keep it beating. Leah, you keep me alive," Said Ethan.

They walked the beaten path together, crossing by the very spot where they had buried Rebekah, such a short time ago. It brought a tear to Leah's eye, not to be able to tell her of the great news, to think of having her as a sister-in-law. As they left the woods, the butterflies in Leah's stomach continued to grow.

They entered the barn of Jacob Longacre in complete silence, as if to tell him something with the mere fact that they weren't telling him something. Ethan let go of Leah's hand for a minute, and took the steps toward his father.

"Father, I need to tell you something, now," said Ethan, in a firm voice.

"You may speak, my son," said his father, in a tone unidentifiable to Leah.

"I love Leah, I know you may not see it now, but I can't live without her, I need your permission, to leave this farm to marry the girl I love. The way of the Amish is not my calling and I am choosing not to be baptized," said Ethan, very seriously.

"My son, I hope that you are making the right choice, I will not forget you, you may take your things and go if you must," said Jacob, with something in his eye that very resembled a tear.


End file.
